Mindfulness is not an empty mind

You sit down, cross-legged and hopeful, breathing in the promise of peace. You made sure the room is quiet, your phone is flipped face-down, and you've set your timer for ten minutes of mindfulness.

But then…

  • Did I follow up on that email?

  • When is that assignment due?

  • What am I going to make for dinner tonight?

Within seconds, your brain gets louder than it ever has been and you think, “I can’t do this. I must be doing this wrong!”

You are not alone.

Somewhere along the line, we’ve absorbed the idea that mindfulness and practices like meditation means silencing every thought until we reach a state of blankness. The good thing is that mindfulness isn’t about having an empty mind. It’s about paying attention to what’s already there.

A wandering mind doesn’t make you bad at mindfulness - it makes you human. Our minds are designed to think, to problem-solve, and future plan what tonight’s dinner will be. The core of mindfulness doesn’t ask us to erase these thoughts; it simply invites us to notice them, without getting dragged into their storyline.

With mindfulness, we cultivate a non-judgemental awareness of the present moment. This isn’t an empty mind per se, it is observant of the way our mind works in the present moment.

When we try to force silence or “peace”, we often end up doing the opposite - we become frustrated, discouraged, and critical of ourselves for not doing it “right”. The problem here is that we think doing mindfulness “right” is reaching a mental zombie-like state.

So what is happening when you practice mindfulness?

Mindfulness is where you build your awareness muscle. You’re strengthening the ability to observe your thoughts without reacting. I know, this sounds difficult and is by no means an easy feat. However, over time, the mental rewiring of mindfulness reshapes how we perceive our thoughts. 

A mindful mind isn’t empty.

When you sit down to practice mindfulness, redshift your focus from aiming for nothingness to aiming for presence. It might sound counterintuitive because we often choose mindful-based practices when we want to escape our mind. But, maybe instead of escaping ourselves, we are trying to escape our unhealthy thought patterns.

Aiming for presence may look like:

  • Feeling your breath 

  • Noticing the sound of birds outside your window

  • Noticing the surge of emotion when a particular thought arises

If your mind wanders during mindfulness meditation, you’re not failing at it. In fact, every time you notice it wandering, you’re succeeding at it!

Mindfulness doesn’t ask for perfection and any advice that suggests so should not be considered. As humans, our brains are wired to think and this is something to appreciate and work with, not against. Let yourself be curious, kind and courageous to sit with whatever’s showing up - without harsh judgement.

With warmth and encouragement,

Ruchi.

Madeleine Stone